i miss you. / Felicia (Fiance)
Your mom asked me to put the We Belong Together song back on here and I couldn't help but think of emotions when I heard that song.. and just going through your pictures too. I'm sitting here crying asking myself why am I crying?? It just makes me realize that the pain of losing you will NEVER go away, it's just life's tasks and things that have to be done daily that help push that pain to the side. I just miss your love so much Mike. I hope your proud of me these days, as you see, I rarely drink anymore and pretty committed to school, I'm making ME proud for once lol. It's mighty stressful though! Just please watch over us (your family and mine), and come visit us in our dreams, I'll always love you Mike. Close
Mike - Thanksgiving was wonderful at your ma and dad's house. As always your mother prepared a delicious banquet for all of us! We all got pretty stuffed! Poor Erin was suffering from a cold but thank goodness she could still taste a bit. We had lots of fun catching up. Still so hard to believe that you are not here. Holiday's are still very devastating, even more so for your mom, dad, Erin and Feesh...its such a bitter reminder of those who are not here. I hope that our presence boosted their spirits up at least a little. We love your family and they will always be a part of ours. We love you Mike.
Mike: Tomorrow, Gramma will be home with all of you kids. Help make her celebration a huge one. I sent a note along with her with a message for you, Autumn & Jerry. As she crosses the river, I know you kids will be there waiting. I told Gramma not to worry about anything here, everything will work out and that her purpose here on earth is now complete. Now it is up to us to carry on. It must be so beautiful where you are. One day all of us will be reunited with you again, but in the meantime continue to watch over especially now when we need your help to move forward one day at a time. Love you, Autumn and Jerry so very much. Times like these are hard, but knowing that you kids are standing by my side helps me alot.
Happy 3rd Angelversary, we love and miss you / Mom And Dad
Mike: We miss you, Autumn and Jerry so very much. We had a dinner for you and Autumn today with all your family and friends. Today when I told Autumn to watch over us, an eagle flew right over the house and went down the driveway. We know that it must have been one of you kids coming to check on us. Take care of Felicia and her family, as her gramma is in the hospital. We're glad she still stops by every once in a while. You, Autumn and Jerry must have had a huge feast today also with all of your friends and relatives. These 3 years went by so fast, but the memories and love that we have for each one of you will forever stay in our hearts. We go down by the lake all the time, it is so peaceful and quiet there no wonder why you always loved being there. Continue to watch over and protect each one of your family.
Thinking of you today and always Michael keeping you in our prayers and thoughts sendinh love and hugs to all your family ..hugs Candy Dermot and Jai xoxox
Lifting you in my prayers / Assia Mom To Wasim Nancy Read >>
Lifting you in my prayers / Assia Mom To Wasim Nancy
Dear Millers family... loosing one child is hard enough but three children... My God i will never understand this world.. My heart aches for you all... Three beautiful children you have.. Im deeply sorry... May God ease your pain and help you through this life untill your angels meet you at the gates of Heaven when that day comes for you to leave this earth.. May all your pain & suffering on this earth be nothing but a bad dream as you get to hold your angels again one day in Heaven xxx God bless xxx
Lyrics to Bye Bye Song / Marsha MOM#2
[Jay-Z] Everytime the guns goes blast Another day goes past I dont miss my dogs ..im wishing the days could go fast. So i could crash close my eyes try to go to sleep and bring you back but i can bring you back {{Nah can bring you back}} so i back back memories of us acting bad wish time could freeze but time is up and i promise ya imma hold it down till its my time to leave and im ok i mean am allright not ok and it hurts my soul i wont see your face but if u truely are in a better place like what say and thats ok ill be allright ive been up all night like if i ddidnt …. with my ni99a to be living with the time tick-tick-ticking away. so forever im forever im in search of yesterday{{Yesterday}} Like a beattle song i close my eyes repeat the song. Tryna bring us back to where we belong middle of the club when be was on. i tear the song blowing on …… going back before …… so when i meet the don u should know i meet way back with my dog when i go so when times says goodbye yall say hello
[Mariah Carey] (Bye Bye [3x]) Bye bye
[Jay-Z] Rock with me Mc Come one !
[Mariah Carey] And you never got the chance to see how good I’ve done And you never got to see me back at number one I wish that you were here to celebrate together I wish that we could spend the holidays together
I remember when you used to tuck me in at night With the Teddy Bear you gave to me that I held so tight I thought you were so strong That you can make it through whatever It’s so hard to accept the fact you’re gone forever
never knew I could hurt like this And everyday life goes on like “I wish I could talk to you for awhile” “I wish I could find a way try not to cry” As time goes by And soon as you reach a better place Still I’ll give the whole world to see your face And I’m right here next to you It feels like you gone too soon The hardest thing to do is say bye bye
(Bye Bye [3x]) Bye bye
This is for my peoples who just lost somebody Your best friend, your baby, your man or your lady Put your hand way up high (Put em up Put em up!) We will never say bye (no, no, no) Mamma’s, daddy’s, sisters, brothers, friends and cousins This is for my peoples who lost their grandmothers Lift your head to the sky (Lift it up lift it up) ‘Cos we will never say bye, bye
never knew I could hurt like this (I never knew it) And everyday life goes on like (everyday of my life I wish) “I wish I could talk to you for awhile” (I wish) “Miss you but I try not to cry” As time goes by (I wish, I wish, I wish as time goes by) And as soon as you reached a better place Still I’ll give the world to see your face And we were here next to you It feels like you’re gone too soon Now the hardest thing to do is say bye bye
(Its hard to say bye bye bye bye bye bye So come on somebody sing it with me Wave your hands up high Hey hey, this if for my peoples who just lost somebody So this is for everybody You put your hand to the sky ‘Cos we will never say bye bye)Close
Thank You Mike / Marsha MOM#2 Hey Mike - Well, as you probably already know, Feesh is heading down the right path now. I know that she is getting strength from somewhere to conquer her problems and who better than the very person that gave her so much love and support (that a parent couldn't). You know what I mean less the hollering, arguments and insults, I love her but it's so hard to be nice. I can't tell you how much I am thankful. I pray that she makes it this time, it is so hard for her and drinking is so easy to turn to when she wants to block and drown out the pain. She needs to deal with losing you, this uncaring state that she has been in for nearly three years has to come to an end. I want my old Felicia back, not this carefree, wildchild who wants to party all the time.
She has also lost so much weight, I was worried at first but now am happy for her...it makes her feel better about herself. With her going to counseling and all, I dont have to worry so much anymore. I know that she is losing weight in a healthy way. If she keeps down this path, I'm sure that she will enroll back into college and stay in classes, do her homework and graduate. She doesn't have much more to go...maybe a semester. As long as she stays away from the partying, she wont be too tired to go to class. I will try to be more supportive also and not so condemning (sp?). LOL However you are getting the message to her, keep it up!
Your mother and Feesh were planning a birthday party together for next year. Feesh will be 25, your mom 55...Feesh a quarter of a century old and your mom the speed limit. LOL I was also brought in because I will be 45. It will be so cool. We plan to have it at your mom and dads house since they have such a big yard with lake front property for the kids to swim. YEAH HOO! Can hardly wait!
Your mom was talking about selling the pontoon. She and your dad are having a hard time deciding since you used it all the time. It's just that nobody else does and it is being wasted just docked. Perhaps you can help them to decide that.
Your namesake, baby Michael was visiting when I was at your mom and dads working on the computer Jerry gave them. He is so cute and such a blessing to be a part of your parents lives. I believe he keeps them going day to day. I know that it is unbearable for your parents to live without all of you and it is Michael and Erin that keeps them going until they can be with you and hold you again. Send them warm hugs and loving whispers...pass this on to Autumn and Jerry to do the same also. Ok, enough of that. Whimper.
Yeah, I was saying that I have been working on Jerry's computer that he gave them. Well I believe the poor thing is on its last legs. Time to put away and preserve. It only has 256mb ram Mike and it takes at least 1gb to run now a days. They just love it so much. HOWEVER, your mother has decided to remove all programs and just keep pictures on it. She is going to get, whoops, has already ordered another computer so that she can keep live connection on the internet without the crashes. Both your parents will love this, so when they are visiting your sites, it will be fast from page to page.
I wrote in the past, that your parents got an "Adopt a Highway" sign. The sign is on the road, that you and Autumn were taken from us. She is setting up the road clean up for June. Thank Goodness! I nearly fainted last year from heat exhaustion. LOL! I better get into shape! I only have a month! Whew! Damn, I felt like such a whimp when your parents who are older than me, were just moving along so fast! LOL
Well Mike, I think I will close for now. I have to get to the Casino and pick up my mom. Such an awful daughter, she has been there for nearly two 1/2 hours now.
I love you Mike and keep the whispers coming. And again, Thank YOu.
Love Marsha
P.S. Don't you just love the song that Felicia uploaded. It is so like your music and the words are just so on.
Need your help Mike / Marsha MOM#2 which makes it even harder. I'm sorry for not vishave iting you for quite some time. I find it easier to stay away so I am not drawn iIt seems when we are at our lowest, we think of all that we lost, nto deep sadness looking over your site. I cry each time I visit as it is a harsh reality that you are not here to joke with, yell at, hear your voice and laugh. I regret that I did not hug you more. It is not my family nature to hug and kiss except for during special occasions. We just know that we love each other. Oh how I wish I could see you just one more time to give you a big hug.
Felicia has been a bit out of control lately. Shit, she has been out of control since you died. She is so lost. It has been nearly 3 years...man it does not seem that long. A few months ago, she started dating a young man. Felicia has not opened herself into a relationship and I believe it is because she feels she will never have a relationship like the one she had with you. You both dated very young and started to grow with and know everything about each other. They are not together now but I believe she without realizing was attempting to start with someone young, like she had with you but eventually learned that she cannot replicate and/or mold the kind of love you both had. There were some things about him that reminded me of you. First true love is hard to replace especially when it was interrupted so tragically. It is not as though you cheated on her so it was easy for her to move on. I do want Felicia to be in love again and to have the same type of happiness but first she needs to deal with losing you. She avoids this part of her life or should I say, she blocks it. A new relationship has to have new foundation, new experiences and new joys, it must have new beginning. It cannot be with someone that reminds her of you.
She is clubbing all the time now - 3-4 times a week. Maybe I am wrong, perhaps she would have been the same if you were still here, we will never know but she definitely did not care for the drinking when you were alive. She started this drinking soon after your death and it has been going on ever since.
That is why I pray that you will visit her in her dreams Mike; you need to talk to her. She is ruining her life and my greatest fear is that I will lose her the same way we lost you. Every night she goes out, I do a silent prayer, "please GOD watch over her and bring her home safe". God, I don’t want a police officer knocking at my door in the early morning hours.
Onto good news, my house has been refurbished. I am so very excited with the new home. We started moving in last week and do I ever have a lot of work to do. Whew! I sure could have used your help. I hurt my back which has delayed things but I still keep working with the lighter stuff. I just want everything to be done. I figure it would take me at least two weeks to have everything arranged perfectly. Though it is a happy time, I can’t help but feel saddened that the house is missing two people, you and JR. If you run into him, send JR my love and tell him I miss him terribly and think of him also...all the time. After I get finished with the house, I will take pictures.
Well, Mike its midnight and I think I will crash, since I have so much to do in the morning. It feels good to talk with you. I'll try not to be such a stranger.